Do I Really Want to Date After All?

Back to the relationship stuff.

Gary called the night before he left for LA, and after chatting a bit about nothingness, the conversation went something like this:

Gary: OK, so I’m going to say something here and you can stop me at any time. (I immediately know where he is going with this but am ever so curious to hear how it comes out.)

Gary: The other night when we were in the car in your driveway I wanted to kiss you, but I wasn’t getting the “go signal”.

Me: <Laughs>

Gary: I just want you to know that I really like you and I’m willing to take whatever you’re willing to give, even friendship. I recognize you have a lot at stake here with those girls and my situation is a risk too. (He means the fact that he wants to move back to the west coast to live near his kids full time, which was the original reason I marked him a “No” after the speed dating thing.)

Me: <Not sure what to say, so out comes a lot of nothing> Thank you for that. That is really generous of you to say. I’m still trying to figure that all out.

The conversation wrapped up soon after that, but the main thing I’m wrestling with right now is my apparent utter lack of physical attraction, and the fact that when he calls he wants to talk for an hour or more each time. I just don’t have that kind of time! And I think I am beginning to resent him for it. Always a recipe for romance, eh?

So I’m feeling very ambivalent about Date #3, currently set up for Saturday, December 6th. I did suggest a more casual outing than the play, but haven’t quite yet determined what would best fit the bill. Some ideas floating around right now are: bowling, a casual wine place where you sit on couches like a living room and drink wine, eat appetizers (or dinner). Any suggestions are welcome!

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2 responses to “Do I Really Want to Date After All?

  1. Oh, I am SO the wrong person to ask about relationship stuff. I’ve been married for 33-1/2 years and have always said that if something were to happen, I would not date. I am perfectly happy living on my own, something that I think would be hard for my kids and the rest of my family to understand. I would go with my gut, though…and it sounds as if you already know the answers. I would recommend the wine bar if you want to talk, bowling if you don’t. Can’t wait to hear the next installment.

  2. Oh, I HATE talking on the phone. I don’t know what to tell you about the physical attraction thing. I’ve had a couple of relationships where I wasn’t initially attracted to the person, but grew into it later (and they ended for other reasons). So I think maybe don’t write him off just yet. And maybe a nice casual wine bar date with lots of talking will get him over the need to talk on the phone so much. Or at least you could casually mention that you have a friend who thinks the telephone is an invention of Satan and you tend to agree. šŸ˜‰

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