I constantly struggle with weight issues. Much of this struggle is not visible to others: my BMI is in the healthy range (barely) and I am in decent shape (not as good as I was 6 months ago though!). But struggle I do. For starters, I have a mammoth sweet tooth and an unnatural relationship with ice cream. So unnatural that I have had to stop buying it. Too many times I have gone through a whole container which supposedly has 14 servings (does anyone ever eat just a half cup of ice cream at a time!?!?) in less than 36 hours.
While I was married I put on quite a lot of weight. I was literally using food as a substitute for love, though I didn’t really realize this till later. After my divorce I joined Weight Watchers and lost it, and looked and felt great.I honestly don’t think I’d have had the mental or emotional “room” to lose that weight inside that marriage. Had we stayed married I feel sure I would have continued to pack on the pounds.
Now I find the weight creeping up again, and I am aware of two things. One, I am again using food as a source of love. And two, I’m feeding that need for love with too much crap.
And so, I need to lay off the crap. I need to stop reaching for another piece of chocolate just because the first (or second, or third, or…) is gone, or because I’m bored, or lonely, or frustrated, or…..When I feel the urge to eat “just because” I need to find another activity to feed that need. Not all needs can be fed with food.